We deserve happiness and only get hurt more misperseved and total hoplessness. This is, however, also why Aspies become isolated. Was knowing i was different. Several conditions can cause itchy throat and ears, such as a cold. Surprisingly, I felt relieved, “Finally an explanation!”. I agree with Aurora and Jane. I feel like an especially loving person, although there are times when I can easily turn off– usually at the end of the day when I am tired and the noise gets overwhelming. I have known all of my life I was different, I have been told my whole life “Keli, you aren’t normal.” Now I know that no matter how much I try, I will never be normal. You’ve done your research, and you deserve to be listened to, without other people’s issues getting in the way. Remember there are others out there holding down jobs and having families. Until then, he had seen only the image I presented to people like him, particularly as I had children and would have never wanted to reveal any unidentified ‘weakness’ in case he thought I couldn’t take care of my kids. My husband says I have it for sure…(he is a saint sent by God),,,,, we did not get married until I was already nearly 50. Even when I did see them we didn’t connect at all. People say I’m too honest and that I’m also too intense with my interests. Mental health is a big taboo in Malaysia and especially if u don’t have much money. There is nothing wrong in being fresh and real. These meds didn’t solve my problems, but complicated them. I was interested in psychology when I was younger (and studied it in the hopes of finding out more about how people think) and have spent most of my life ‘studying’ people to try and work out answers about how ‘normal’ people think, to no avail. How do I be my true self when I have been being my social mask for all my life? Keep looking for help and have come across many blogs and a common thread seems to be that we have finally found a match to our life’s issues that brings a knowing, a FINALLY, an AT LAST, that describes us and our symptoms and brings an unburdening, amazing relief and explanation for everything we have gone through with the trials of trying to fit in…….with family, friends, schools, jobs, relationships. Does any of this sound familiar to anyone and does anyone think my husband could be right. Some form of autism runs in my family and as a child, had I known I had autism, I might have come up with an argument like the one you make. So I finish this post by thanking ‘Life on the spectrum’ for being a fabulous resource for all those interested, questioning and advising. Hi all I always knew it was more their problem than mine and tried not to take it personally, but this helps even more. I was finally diagnosed this past summer at age 47. Like any other human being, I would rather be loved for who I am than to just be tolerated. I am a 28 year old woman very recently diagnosed with Aspergers and am finding the lack of information (specifically for women) about it terrifying. With a diagnosis of Asperger’s syndrome, you can find therapies and treatments to help you cope with any challenges you face and live a healthy, productive life that’s fulfilling and happy. I didn’t play with other kids. This is why I’m the way I am. I had a horrendous childhood and have spent my life being a chameleon, desperately trying to second guess people and fit in. My family says i lack empathy. If I’m correct about this, that would mean WE, and others with autism, would be the smartest ones, who really know how to care for each other and the earth. I do not want to mention it at work due to the stigma. Lol people judge you for what they dislike about themselves! God bless. What’s more I have hated the fact that I feel hated and that I seem like a friendless joke in the world. Explain yrself to yourself by knowing about asperger and what descriptors of asperger describe you but consider are you the one who is defined by official diagnose or are you just explained by what they say is description of asperger. My heart skips beats and feels like it will burst. I am 50, and struggled with depression since age 10. What form of meditation? I do know that as I’ve got older I’ve got easier with social interactions but I do remember a time when if I saw somebody I knew in the street I’d go out of my way to avoid them because I couldn’t think of anything to say to them. rom what iv read and related to me on this site, knowing where or when to start a conversation is frustrating. To a certain degree, he was right. And people do. I was diagnosed with mild depression. Embrace the difference. The second reason I think is because typically we get hypercocues on a topic and we are concerned with the facts of the information being put out, and it makes no sense to us why we have to be sensitive to someone’s ego when we are discussing facts. It’s worth writing it all down before hand, and/or practising what you want to say. I don’t eat, I hardly sleep. But I do hope you find what you need. I spent until I was 40 trying to fit in, and it takes a huge amount of confidence to face that many years of failure. Someone had mentioned it years ago, but before she reached elementary school, it was difficult to really add all of the pieces together. But recently I’ve been thinking about my worst moments mental health wise and I think maybe that due to social pressures and my observations of the negative reactions to this sort of behaviour I have since I was quite young internalised my meltdowns. My life is cumulatively ruined. It’s a hundred times easier to let go of the false deductions, the maddening and consequent false accusations, the verbal abuse and the false logic knowing where it’s comes from and why it’s there. Thank you so much for your thoughtful website and comments (I read them all). I am highly educated. Is this something any other diagnosed Aspie women can relate to? A lot of times I’m happy I succeed at this. You are not a bad person only seeing things differently☺ I bet your good at lots of things and try hard to fit in your don’t say what what type of job you have. Now that I know. I have had times of being made fun of wherever I happen to be at home or anywhere. It was after my dyslexia diagnosis in 2010, that made me look further into this as most people I’ve met with dyslexia can bluff and make things up easily, plus I was having great difficulty in work that led me to this discovery. I feel guilty that our husbands friendship may be awkward…. It’s getting easier for me to find myself now. This is why I prefer to write conversations. I can’t describe how it felt to FINALLY be able to relate to a female in terms of thought process/masking/fear of Bi-polar & split personality disorder. I have read your words through my tears and I am happy to learn that there are parents (especially dads, since mine has traumatised me) who are willing to meet their little girls halfway. I really think this is something that should be investigated, because if it is true, I think there are MANY people, both men and women, who would be in the spectrum. I do not really know what is means to be an Aspie. An Aspie doesn’t take to the notion of “extended” family–people not in her immediate, daily circle, who know her and understand her needs. I am 38 and was just diagnosed with Aspergers this week (along with anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, post traumatic stress disorder and depression). I’ve never known how to react appropriately with people. I am observant to such an extent its like a 6th sense. Then, last year, I found out that there was a local clinic that does adult Asperger assessments. How did you get on at the doc? In the earlydays when she came to our house my son and her used to play card games or board games. I’m currently in a full time job that I am desperate to leave but have the dreaded fear that there’s nothing else out there for me that will allow me to thrive because of who I am with Aspergers. That likelihood is high and it is helping me feel a bit less anger about them and the way I was raised. Get the…. He responds as if I am being unreasonable – meanwhile to me such things are so “loud” I can’t ignore them, can’t turn away, can’t focus on something else. If anything, my daughter doesn’t have the ability to fake it as well as her peers.. Over time, I concluded that most people were selfish and mean and dishonest. » Symptoms of Asperger’s syndrome (from an aspie perspective) I think it’s crazy that dying in the heat is socially acceptable. It hit me like lightening that complete utter open honesty is simply not what “normal” people do and no one, (or few), appreciate it in me. This is a good time to start minimazing the damage the world could inflict on her. I have love for all people but choose not to like all those who are of impure hearts and minds with no clear conscious. I am open to answer any questions you might have. The anxiety, the dread, the making excuses for it to be over right after starting. That doesn’t mean you have it, obvs, but look at http://www.help4aspergers.com for two very useful charts. She was going back to where she felt better and would enjoy the people and the work. If it wasn’t for a Head Teacher at a school I attended as a child who told me “You have a brain in there”, pointing to my head, I wouldn’t have thought otherwise. Every so often I have a read up on Aspergers and it’s great that this time round I’m finding info for women. and mostly just wondering if being a virgin and wanting to stay so for life is a symptom of AS? Diagnosis for women Unfortunately churches are often places where people pretend to be oh so kind when they are actually sharks. Any thoughts would be welcome. Part of the pain of my 15 year failed marriage was my husband’s constant harassment of my odd traits and social ineptitude. Do you have anybody in the family or friends you can confide in. I’m INTJ too! For recognition of my fortitude and perseverance? I’ve covered so well for so long that no one has a clue that I’m on the spectrum. Because my other conditions include things like epilepsy and having had a dozen+ surgeries for various reasons, I had not even thought about many of these aspects of my personality/behavior as issues. What a conundrum! I am rather mature age now and only now finding out why my life has been as it has. Anyway, a diagnosis for me would really be a gift of knowledge – my closest friends are already “weirdos”, possibly fellow undiagnosed Aspergergarians … okay, Aspies … so it wouldn’t really affect my social life … maybe it would open it up. » Think you might have Asperger’s syndrome?” This wouldnt be ideal flr my husband or family however. I was very successful at work, but have had disastrous relationships. Sometimes i get frustrated with all the stereotypical “emotionless autistic man” talk so i always like it when i find pages like this. Hello ladies, I am an Aspien Superwoman (apparently, but rarely feel like one) who was diagnosed in my early 40s. ���ф/|�, ��F7ݗ�����8�`x��W� ��!s�����[ý��5��/�qw��,�qw�T���r�p.�����|��q����j�� �QpH�W\ ,�>��‰�O�t_��c��"���s�����Tb��c��=2�pۻ���)�=���iM?ʁ�r�G��As��_&�����{�C�K��)�x�y�nW����M_��LΩ{r��x}G�~^��¦W\>�˴���l���vx7m��� Its chaos at the moment that needs to be organised chaos. I struggle to multi-task, as I prefer to just focus on one task at a time, which I find difficult at work. This is very helpful. I can’t say that it was based upon Asperger’s entirely, but I think it could have been a contributing factor. The behavior you’ve described as “rude” was only rude if it was intended to add to your pain. My response “Because I want to know why I’m Me, and whether it’s because I have Aspergers”. I just read the symptoms and nearly can’t breathe. Le monde imaginaire devient une échappatoire, à moins que ne soit développé un intérêt pour un autre pays… she thinks woman don’t like her because of the way she dresses but she doesn’t realize that the things she does and says are rather rude. I have never got on with people, yet have spent most my life trying to. The choice is one I already made but at lest now I’ve a better idea of what the questions was. just came across this (hope you read it as it’s been a while since you posted) and I strongly identify. The more I read the more I am convinced that I have Aspergers. We’ll go over all the different…, Although there's some overlap between bipolar disorder and autism, it's unclear how many people live with both conditions. (Something i can’t get my head around). IMO, everyone tries to put their best foot forward in public.

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